The Adnostic

If there's one thing I know how to take care of, it's leather. I've been riding horses since I was five and knowing how to clean and take care of your equipment just comes with the territory. When you think about all the leather products I use on a regular basis, it's a bit daunting. Tall boots, half-chaps, full chaps, paddock boots, bridles, saddles, protective horse boots, girths, gloves, and a bunch of other seemingly mundane items. Heck, even the crop I use has a little bit of leather on the end.

The bottom line is I know leather. How this matters to you, my faithful readers, is that it has come to my attention that many of you don't know anything about leather and this is not good, because leather, when properly cared for, will last longer than you will.

So here's a few bits of advice, which can be applied to any leather product....

1) Water and leather are not friends. Water is leather's toxic friend that is only good in small doses because it saps all of leather's natural oils. So don't use water or water based products to clean leather. Alcohol is even worse.

2) Regular soap and leather are not friends (for the same reason as above, only more so). Use Murphy's Oil Soap. Murphy's is your best buddy when it comes to cleaning leather. It is usually intended to clean hardwood floors and furniture, so you won't find it in the shoe care aisle, but you will find it among the household cleaning products. It's cheap and it works like a charm.

3) There is a correct way to clean leather. Take a clean sponge (make sure it hasn't been used to clean your house with any chemical cleansers), wet it, and squeeze as much water as you can out of it. Apply a dollop of Murphy's to the sponge, work it into the sponge, and then squeeze even more water out of the sponge. The less water you use, the better. Vigorously rub the leather with the sponge until clean. Repeat as necessary.

4) But that nasty bit of whats-it still isn't coming off. Try cleaning your sponge again, use more Murphy's, and rub harder.

5) Um. It's still there. Hmmm. You may need the help of a professional, but as a last resort (and I do mean LAST) try pure ammonia. Now, ammonia is leather's worst enemy, but damn does it clean just about anything. If you do use this, apologize profusely to the leather with a lot of neatsfoot oil afterwards. Same application method - a barely damp sponge and lots of rubbing.

6) Occasionally oiling your leather is a good thing. It's like a spa day for leather. Nice every once in a while, but not every day. Neatsfoot oil is good, but hand lotion will work in a pinch.

Now go forth and be the best damn dominatrix you can be!