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Build It Woman!!

June 02, 2005

Everyone has a talent. Some people are natural writers, musicians, artists, or athletes. Other people, like myself, have more obscure gifts. For me, I have a natural born talent for putting together IKEA furniture.

Don't mock me! It's the truth. I'm a freaking genius with an Allen wrench!

This special purpose comes in handy when a certain someone who doesn't even know how to use a hammer wants to buy a Swedish bookcase and needs help putting it together.

Gary: I gotta get a new bookcase. Will you build it?
Me: How much?
Gary: One dollar.
Me: That won't even cover gas.
Gary: I don't pay for farts.
Me: Do you want it built or not?
Gary: Yes.
Me: Money talks and I'm listening.
Gary: $2..... cash..... cashola.
Me: Apparently you are not interested in getting this built.
Gary: Build it woman!!
Me: Build it yourself.
Gary: I'll hire Julio..... or Jose.
Me: At those prices, go for it. A day laborer won't even breathe on you for $2.

Me: You realize I'll be blogging this.

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